[personal profile] jaipur
I have to admit to having mixed feelings about reunion. I do want to see people, but I am also aware that a lot of the people who will be there will be nothing like me, doing things I don't do. I have memories of past reunions of feeling very awkwardly out of place, at least around the SWIL and later years' Psi Phi people. I have never enjoyed the Saturday cook-out--the few times I went, I felt like a ghost on the edges of someone else's party. I have never played Settlers of Cataan and that's not my thing; I used to play Kremlin and Skitgubbe and that's about as complex as I get. I feel stupid not being able to play these strategy games, I don't know the more recent years' people. I didn't do the SWIL vacations, I don't have kids who play with other people's kids.

The reunion in some ways highlights the loss of social connections, given how tightly bonded I was with the old gang in college. And that is saddening (why did I ever think I fit in?). But dude, I really don't game, and that's been the thread that forms the social network glue for so many of these get-togethers over the past 25 years. My choice, and I chose a different path. I just pay for it occasionally.

(Part of the angst about reunion is it also highlights the life I've led and how incredibly boring I think I am to other people because I am monomaniacal about work, mostly, so I feel like I'm coming up short in the "how is your life going" department. Everyone else has things to talk about besides work, and I really don't. I'm happy that way generally speaking because I find work to be incredibly fulfilling, but getting together with the old college crowd always makes me feel like I was supposed to Do Better. What have I done for social justice causes lately? Why am I not balancing a deep passion for recycling or something that makes the world a better place along with my work? or at least why am I still eating meat? I'm such a consumer! I'm so disappointingly mainstream! It's silly but there it is. College reunion is the one place where I explicitly feel like I'm not keeping up with the Joneses, even though it is on a moral level instead of a physical one. ;)

On the other hand, reunion is at this point a cool mix of people I kind of keep up with from LJ and FB, and people I haven't seen in YEARS and have been wondering how they were doing. :) So I don't know what I am worried about, really. I'm taking the hubby so he can see the campus and some of my friends, and that also will keep it low-key.
Anonymous( )Anonymous This account has disabled anonymous posting.
OpenID( )OpenID You can comment on this post while signed in with an account from many other sites, once you have confirmed your email address. Sign in using OpenID.
Account name:
If you don't have an account you can create one now.
HTML doesn't work in the subject.


Notice: This account is set to log the IP addresses of everyone who comments.
Links will be displayed as unclickable URLs to help prevent spam.



August 2015

161718 19202122

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Sep. 20th, 2017 03:53 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios